What just happened?

Hey you,

What on earth was going on with this day, I bet you didn’t expect that when you walked through the door this morning. It’s a good job you’re smart enough to know that shit happens and when it does it’s usually on a Friday or a Monday.

You can breathe now, you know that right. This day is  done and you can stop stressing until tomorrow. You’ll not, I know that, but I feel obliged to tell you anyway.

Some things are out of your control and today just happened to be a shining example of that. Don’t worry, your work will still be there tomorrow, stacking up around you like dominoes. Just tread carefully, we don’t want to do anything that will start that chain reaction.

I love the words plan and prioritise, don’t you. They invoke the sense that you can do anything as long as you have given it due consideration. The sad thing is though, it’s hard to think straight when you’re standing at the foot of an avalanche that threatens to consume you. You just have to stand your ground and have hope, or maybe it’s faith. Hope that you can make it through and live to see another day.

There’s this sense of dread within you, I can feel it. This fear of what is to come, what lies ahead.

Keep breathing, we’ll face that bridge when we come to it.




Just keep on going…

Dear Me,

I know you’re stressing about going back to work tomorrow, you will more than most and no matter how many times I tell you that your worrying is pointless, you will still do it.

You’re not the only person who dreads going back after a spell away, if you would ever allow yourself to think about it logically you would realise this.

I know you’re feeling a bit lost this week, it didn’t really turn out how you intended did it, for many reasons. The break that you hoped would be relaxing turned into a bit of a nightmare, but hey, you got through it and tomorrow is the start of a new week, you just have to up and move on.

I know you don’t always acknowledge it, but you did OK this week. Sure some things could have been handled better, but you’re not an expert, so why do you expect so much from yourself.There never was going to be a handbook that walked you through how to deal with the side of Dementia that shows you bed wetting is not solely reserved for children, that was always going to be something you would have to learn for yourself. You did, can’t you see that. You dealt with it as you needed too and for now hopefully it is a problem solved, don’t dwell on it any more, you need  to move on.

You need to remind yourself to take things one day at a time, perhaps even one step at a time. I know sometimes life consumes you, because I know you better than you know yourself, but this anxiety and worry is doing you no good, be kind to yourself, because without you, there is nothing else.

Take time, breathe and relax, tomorrow is another day.